Blog

I tugged Mike towards a ledge with a view across Hells Canyon. It stole our thoughts and held us suspended in space. Our essence, just a hazy imprint, lingered on the mountains across the way from when we met with Old One and his brother, Old Chief Joseph. Dulaa introduced us to Chief Smohalla. His essence was like a favorite scent that he wrapped around us and took us to a different time. When we returned - deep peace and joy prevailed. Extract from Ch. 41 - Mountains Call in Oon'ch-illia ' The Secret Human Life of an Ancient Star Woman '.

The frozen lake cracks and groans at the edges. Life returns in the dapple of the sunlight, and insects revel in the tiny pools of water. Ice crystals shimmer and bubble as they break away, revealing streams of moss and algae. Sounds reverberate around the mountains. The constant movement beneath the lake, of life breathing once again. We rest a while on a rickety bench. Our eyes are drawn towards the sentinel high above us, a statue on the rugged mountainside. There is heat around his chest. Upon the highest peak, seven golden columns of light flash as one then disappears. Stillness descends from the mountaintop. Whooping cries echo within the trees. We are not alone. There is no fear, only peace. Our tribe is close. The veils are translucent; perhaps we could hunt with them if we choose to. Yet, instead, we stay to pay homage to Old One and his visitors and hazard a guess at their discussions. Our world stills. It’s frozen in time for nine minutes of peace and solitude.

Some people manage to live life by coasting along, taking each day as it comes, but for others life feels constantly difficult and full of pitfalls and unhappiness. Generally, for most people, life is full of ups and downs, with variations of peaks and troughs, but there are also times when we can get stopped in our tracks, very unexpectedly, and for numerous reasons, for instance, illness, accidents, bereavements, or on a more positive note, promotion, change of job, new relationship, birth of a child. Changes in circumstances or of attitudes and behaviour can also be altered by what some people may term as ‘an act of god’, divine intervention’ or ‘someone looking down on me!’. This is the ‘magic moments’ when a person cannot explain what has happened to cause a change in them or in what they are going through at the time. An example of this may be, a feeling of intense anxiety and panic about attending an important function but suddenly a feeling of calm serenity enables their natural coping skills to emerge with a change of attitude and ability to manage the situation with ease. However, it is important to remain open to the possibility of these things happening, some people totally close themselves off because they are so low in mood and lack self- worth that they think magic moments can only happen to other people. If they reach out to another person for help or offer an act of kindness to someone else, then they may then acknowledge when a magic moment happens. Negative thinking and worrying thoughts cloud judgement and self-belief and causes doubt about whether human kindness and positive experiences really exist. It is always astounding though, even for those people in the depths of despair how something unexpected happens to make positive changes. Any form of caring interaction between two or more people can bring this about. Love is the answer - everything around us exists because of love, and features strongly in the lyrics of songs, as well as many of the storylines on the soaps and films on TV. We all want someone to love us and accept us, if we feel loved then life feels better, and it is during times of celebration that love makes everything seem so much better and brighter.

At the beginning of creation light was formed from within the space of darkness. This light created consciousness, and over time, creation of matter in many forms, including ourselves. Physical life provides the challenges of darker times, to help our souls to learn and grow, taking us back towards the light by attaining the wisdom to assist in our evolution. All our greatest lessons come from the darkness: I am the light within the dark, I cannot see the light as I am it. The darkness is the space which formed my creation. You and I travelled through the dark to reach the light, where all new life has begun. Do not fear the dark, as it is through that, in which we must travel and experience in its entirety. By doing so, we can find new ways to navigate through it, to see, feel and know that light is always there. Many people become consumed with the darkness of fear and powerlessness and anxious about future events that may never happen. They are blind to the knowledge that the light is within them, and they need to take their awareness inside to their heart centre, instead of their heads, to learn the lessons they need to progress on their life’s path. When you awaken spiritually - the light within is ignited again - enabling the process of moving through the darkness more smoothly, and the light of wisdom and growth gradually shining brighter. There are many ways to wake up to this light within you and to realize how closely we are all connected spiritually. Within every cell of your body and on each level of human existence you are constantly moving towards the light, which is what soul evolution is all about, gaining knowledge and power from your physical experiences. To attract the light, be the light, exist within the darkness but not be consumed by it. When you were born you entered through the tunnel of darkness into the light. The same happens when your physical body dies, you enter a tunnel of darkness and move back towards the light, passing through to the next plane of existence. Ultimately, you are a soul, having a human experience, which enables you to learn and grow, to experience life in many forms and within different times to enable you to evolve to higher realms of existence.

This book was created from a collection of daily reflections written every day throughout 2020. They are based on personal experiences and observations made of life during the Coronavirus Pandemic and the importance nature plays within the healing process. Insights were also gained whilst experiencing another phase of my spiritual journey and stepping into my higher self ‘Oonchillia White Bird’. Oonchillia Actrom Illumi or ‘child of light’ – is a star-being who connected with a Native American tribe and merged with a young female warrior named White Bird. Over time they became known as one entity and have often been referred to as ‘Ancient Woman of the Stars’. Oonchillia White Bird has had many incarnations on earth during many times of significant global events. During the past 10 years I have been coached by my tribe family to remember that is who I am and why I am now in the incarnation of Cathryn during this time in history. My purpose is to assist humanity to shift perspective towards harmonious ways of living and uniting as a peaceful nation. These daily reflections are therefore influenced by Native American spiritual beliefs, but Christian beliefs are also shared as regards to Christmas. The Haiku poems on each opening chapter are also a reflection of ways indigenous people connect with the natural world. ‘Haiku’ is a Japanese art form that is more than 400 years’ old. It is nature poetry that captures a moment in time, with one sentence split into two and a third sentence as a juxtaposition. In Japanese these are written as 17 sound units, which in English has been adopted as 17 syllables, with a 5,7,5 format of a 3-line poem, however, many advocates advise against being rigid with this, as it takes away the creativity and flow, and the Japanese sound units do not translate into other languages in quite the same way. The following example is quite typical as an observation of nature which has an impact on the writer: The robin’s sweet song Tree hopping far out of sight Reminds me of home!

During any given day your physical and emotional energy levels fluctuate, for some people it can be like the ebb and flow of a gentle tide, or for others it’s more like crashing waves, and then brief moments of quiet before the tide hits again. As the mind and body are so intertwined, emotional states dictate the physical energy levels, and if depleted regularly can lead to short or long term illnesses. It is therefore important to be mindful about what affects the emotional energy levels. People are often unaware that their energy is being drained, whether by other people (usually unintentionally), or by certain situations or within negative environments. People who give a lot of themselves to others, or work in emotionally charged places where there is a lot of negative energy i.e. people angry, frustrated and unhappy, will be affected by this energy, whereby they may feel drained all the time, as if their own energy is being sucked from them. If then they feel they have no control over their environment they may repress their own emotions or try to make things better, but may feel they are stuck in a vicious cycle. This increases stress levels and affects confidence and self esteem, ultimately resulting in disturbed sleeping and eating patterns, depleting pain tolerance, and likely resulting in illnesses, where the body is trying to right itself. Awareness is the key; sensing the energy levels dipping, and knowing what things are affecting it. It is also important to be more aware of how you deal with difficult situations and people. Do you avoid confrontation, and try to keep the peace? Do you push down your own feelings and needs to keep others happy? Do you worry about things, but are fearful of taking any form of action? Do you remain in unhealthy relationships because you don’t want to be alone, or are more focused on the other person’s needs more than your own? Are you driven by " I should " and feel contained within other people’s rules and boundaries, resulting in feeling you don’t know your own mind? This can also lead to repressed emotions, turning feelings inwards on yourself or expressing them inappropriately. If any, or all of these questions rings warning bells for you, it is now time to start taking care of your emotional energy levels. If they are regularly depleted, there is a high probability that you are already feeling it physically too. It is also important to notice if you feel drained after being with certain people. If someone else is low in energy or holding onto negative energy, then they will naturally try to get the energy they need from other people. You may need to limit your time with these people, then give yourself time to relax and re-coup your energy. It may help to keep a diary of events that trigger symptoms of depleted energy i.e. fatigue, problems with eating or sleeping, shutting off from others, or heightened emotions. By exploring and identifying what is affecting your emotional and physical energy levels, you are then starting the journey of positive change. You can then learn to respect yourself more, address your emotional needs and discover new ways of re-energizing yourself.

A chance meeting or was it ‘Fate’, was the hand of the creator guiding them to a time and place where they would finally meet. A newly found direction and passion for learning for both of them, joining a training course in Hypnotherapy; re-discovering skills and the ability to heal and change lives with words and voice. They both knew they were naturals and this was what they had been born to do. They were strangers at first, but their eyes met and each sensed a familiarity, a knowing of each other, which brought light into their hearts and a need to understand more in their minds. Was it just the thirst for learning and discovering a new working life path, having something in common! Yet there was an attraction and a deeper connection than with any others on that course! Michael knew instantly, whereas for Cathryn it took a little longer to realise what, in a short space of time, became so evident, they were meant to be, but there were so many reasons why it shouldn’t happen. They were both married with two children each, both a boy and girl of similar ages, and with the girls, even the same name. As they talked, there became so much more that they had in common; it was almost as if they fitted together, two peas in a pod! Yet they had lived separate lives not knowing of each others existence until this day, or had they? Looking back and since the history they have had together since that day, an early spring day in 1992, it is now evident that they have known each other for a very long time, but more will be said about that at a later time. Their friendship and closeness quickly blossomed. It became obvious that they could not physically be together, yet they met briefly when they were able to, although both were concerned about hurting those they loved if they did find a way to be together. For Cathryn, now she realised her heart was with another, the end of her marriage came quickly, and upset for her children ensued. She also suffered much hurt as the aftermath rippled around her home and family life, resulting in her losing everything for a while, yet she went on to study at University and work within the voluntary sector. Her children were her main focus, whilst supporting their upbringing and especially their emotional and mental stability through it all. For Michael, his work and family life had to take precedence, and there were other factors which prevented them from meeting, which remains private to them both. Letters became the only form of contact and after some years they petered out. Each kept the other in their hearts, but life had to go on, reasons then unknown to the other, but which yet meant separation, not knowing if they would ever meet again. After several more years, intermittent meetings began, which often left despondency in their wake, but there was one brief meeting in 2002 that brought hope of change. Memories and life stories were shared with some reigniting of feelings and realisation of common goals and achievements, yet sadly, this was not the time for a long term reunion and again their paths diverted, with sadness and frustration in their wake. A couple of years later, what seemed at the time to be a last ditch attempt, they met up again, but it didn’t go well, and they wondered if they were destined to remain apart. In 2011 life had moved on a pace for both, each however desperate for love and compassion, understanding and support that perhaps could only be sourced from each other. One reached out to the other tentatively during a prolonged time of turmoil and grief. The other was hungry for that contact, had been waiting and at times searching for the other. Finally they had been brought back together, a re- acquaintance at first, then a blossoming friendship; and within several months a relationship was developing with mutual love and respect, a growing trust despite adversity, and a sharing of histories and occurrences that had previously kept them apart, which had resulted in hurt and mistrust during those past times for one of them. Pure love and belief, a deeper knowing that they were always meant to be, helped them to overcome the things that may have resulted in their relationship failing; whereas for many people the obstacles may have been too great. Over time, they had to work through the realities of each others histories, supporting each other throughout all the highs and lows, and they succeeded in staying together. They have continued to grow together and remain strong and loyal whilst both having to deal with their own past traumas, mutually supporting each other along the way. There is so much more to this story, which was alluded to earlier on. Was it fate, was it the hand of the creator that brought them together, but left them waiting patiently for the right time? Were there other forces or influences at hand? Did they already know each other from a long time ago, perhaps many lifetimes, even many eons of time? If you wish to follow this story further, to understand why they were always meant to be together, and how it may touch the lives of many others and perhaps your own life - please read their other true life stories and their first book: “After 189 Miles Turn Left”; which are available via www.towardinnerpeace.com